Count Jeff (2011)

Vampires: Creatures of legend and myth. Dark. Sexy. Eternal. They control the shadows, haunt our dreams, rule the night... and apparently they also deliver. After an unexpected drunken on night stand with a truly 'bad girl,' regular guy Jeff Bryers is about to get his own taste of immortality. Waking up with two fresh puncture wounds on his neck, an unquenchable thirst for blood, and the inability to hold down a 'day' job, Jeff soon realizes that eternal life sucks... in a big way. It's one thing to be overweight, balding, and broke. It's another to be stuck that way for eternity!