Artie and Paul (2023)

Strange things are happening in the world. Reports of 26 hours of daylight and the appearance of three full moons in one month are sending people into full-on panic mode: is this another terrible consequence of global warming? Is the world coming to an end? HOWARD HENDERSON, a high school history teacher in Texas, believes he has the answer: it is the Greek gods behind the odd behavior of the sun and moon. His podcasts and YouTube videos garner thousands of views, and while most find Howard to be a hilarious quack, it turns out...he's right. But seriously, though, what's a bored sun god to do except cause trouble? It's all just so dull when you've been watching over the same stupid planet for so long. APOLLO passes the time by throwing raucous parties at his temple, and, well, not doing his job as god of the sun. His trouble-making twin sister (and goddess of the moon) ARTEMIS spends her time crashing his parties (while also not doing her job). It all seems like a hilarious joke to Artemis, but this time, she's gone too far, causing mass chaos at Apollo's latest party and bringing destruction on his beloved temple. WTF, Artemis? BOOM. A thunderclap heralds the arrival of their annoyed father, ZEUS, the king of the gods. Why, why, why can't these two spoiled kids of his stop their childish pranks and get along? Artemis and Apollo blame each other. She destroyed his temple. He spoiled a TV show finale. She threw away his sandwich. He called her asexual. Zeus doesn't want to hear any of it. He's had enough of their bickering. It's time they came home to Olympus and face the Board of the Olympians to receive their punishment. Wait, punishment? It turns out, the twins' "un-godlike" behavior has threatened to reveal the secret of the gods, a secret that has been kept from mortals for thousands of years. The latest incident involving the destruction of Apollo's temple has prompted Howard Henderson to take to the news networks to reiterate his "Greek god theory". The Board of Olympians unanimously decides to send Artemis and Apollo to Texas in order to rectify their wrongs: they must convince Howard that they do not exist...all while fitting in as regular, human teenagers. And if they do not succeed in their mission? They will be the recipients of the worst fate a god could imagine: demotion to mortal being. Oh, but the Board isn't done yet. Not only will Zeus accompany the twins to Texas, but so will HERA, the illiterate, mortal-obsessed goddess that will masquerade around as their mom. Like, come on. They don't fit in already with other gods. The twins make a secret promise. They have to stick together. It's a promise that they break immediately on day one of school. Apollo is distracted by the pretty girls. Artemis is convinced she sees the reincarnation of her old boyfriend from thousands of years ago. Great start to their mission, right? How are they going to survive high school? How will they fit in a world where they can't share their godly gifts? And what mission do they really have to accomplish before they can go back to Olympus and home?