Ik wil gelukkig zijn (2016)

Fien de la Mar (1898-1965) was an exceptional actress. She performed in revues and cabarets, but also played big dramatic roles. Without reservation she could reveal herself in her role and thereby give her character unknown eminence. She did not care for the distinction between high and low art and could excel in both. In other aspects she was also elusive and could not be classified. She did not seem to be interested in politics and the world around her, but refused to become a member of the Dutch Culture Chamber during the war. She had intense amorous affaires, but Piet Grossouw remained the most important man in her life. In 1947 her big dream of having her own theatre came true: the De La Mar Theatre in Amsterdam. She could be seen there in production after production. Three years later however, the theatre was bankrupt. After that she felt out of place in theatre. Her husband, Piet Grossouw, who had been her bedrock throughout her turbulent life, died in 1957. In 1965 she committed suicide. Fien de la Mar was someone with so many talents, and yet did not know how to handle them. They should have been spread over three lives in order to fully develop. It was an indulgence that finally proved fatal. A lot of images of her have been kept. Photos have been taken of her during her whole life, from the time of infancy until just before her passing. Between 1934 and 1940 she acted in nine films. By way of film fragments and photos the film evokes an image of the magic of her play, the euphoria and despair in her life. In the soundtrack we hear a play of sound from her film scenes and quotes from interviews about her.