From Diana to Kate: Royal Marriages Are No Fairy Tales

I've watched stuff like "The Crown", "The King's Speech", and "Spencer", but honestly, I never really cared much about the British royal family. Sure, I learned about constitutional monarchy in school, but that didn't make me an expert in British politics or royal gossip. I mean, why should I care? It's all happening an ocean away. But then along came Kate Middleton.

My Twitter and Instagram feeds are flooded with speculations about Kate's "disappearance"—some say she hasn't bounced back from an "abdominal surgery" back in January, while others go as far as suggesting that she is actually dead after being accidentally killed by her husband Prince William. Amidst these rumors lurks a shadowy figure— Rose Hanbury, who has been rumored to be having an affair with Prince William since 2019, although she recently denied these allegations through her lawyers.

But you know how juicy rumors can be. After getting sucked into countless conspiracy theories online, I find myself becoming a die-hard fan of modern British royal drama. And as I dig deeper, starting with Kate, into labels like "Duchess", "husband's cheating", and "charity", everything seems to circle back to one key figure— Princess Diana.

Princess Diana was born in 1961 into a wealthy aristocratic family. Her parents divorced when she was six, and she took on the role of caretaker for her younger brother. Her education wasn't extensive, and after leaving school, she worked a series of low-paying jobs. In 1981, after only meeting then-Prince Charles 13 times, she accepted his proposal and became the Princess of Wales. They had two sons, William and Harry, but the marriage was always strained by Prince Charles's affair with Camilla Shand. In 1992, Princess Diana and Prince Charles separated, and soon after, their issues became public. In 1996, they divorced. A year later, she died in a car crash in Paris at the age of 36.

That's the basic info you can find about Princess Diana on Wikipedia. But let me tell you about this documentary I stumbled upon— "Diana: In Her Own Words", released on the 20th anniversary of her passing in 2017.

Unlike previous interpretations of her life from a third-party perspective, this documentary, as its title suggests, tells her story in her own words. However, there are two versions—one from the National Geographic Channel (NGC) and the other from Channel 4 in the UK. While both are based on Princess Diana's audio and video recordings (materials she used during speech training to counter the royal family), the NGC version takes a relatively moderate stance, while the Channel 4 version is more radical, often siding with Princess Diana and even mocking Prince Charles and the British royal family. I only managed to find the Channel 4 version. Anyway, through this documentary, I pieced together a more vivid image of Diana.

She was an idealist when it came to love and marriage, but she was rejected and hurt by her husband who refused to stay faithful. Imagine being a naive 19-year-old girl who was duped into marriage because you were a suitable choice, not because your partner actually loves you.

She was a populist, unconventional, rebellious member of the royal family. As a result, she did not receive the care of the Queen in her marital discord with Prince Charles, but was instead ridiculed and suppressed by other members of the royal family, who accused her of not performing the royal duties due to personal emotions, making private royal affairs public, and repeatedly intervening in controversial issues such as AIDS and homeless relief as a pioneer.

She had always been in a slump, though she was constantly resisting against it. Initially, she confronted her husband's affair with Camilla, and directly asked her to stop affecting their marriage. After she lost hope in her marriage, she channeled her energy into public service and charity to seek public support.

Seeing those vivid images in the documentary, I forgot about hard facts like royal duties, the public, and the societal conditions of Britain at the time. What stuck with me was the image of her sitting on the couch, shrugging; sometimes, she could be shy, angry, or carrying an innocent, teasing smile.

Peeling away the harsh history and her royal title and glory, what I see is a vulnerable but resilient woman who was betrayed in marriage, but never compromised and fought back instead. As Ken Wharfe (Princess Diana's bodyguard) said in the interview: "20 years on, they're still telling her that she's mad, but a fact to this, here is a case where the woman tried to come to terms that her husband was in a relationship and having an affair with another woman. It is as simple as that."

Well, even everyday marriages are a struggle, let alone royal ones.

And here's something for you to think about—there's a snippet in the Channel 4 version where Prince William speaks off-camera in Princess Diana's recording, suggesting that he knew about these secret interviews and possibly sided with his mother. But now, if the rumors about him and Rose are true – which will be very saddening – then hasn't he ended up hurting his wife and children, like his father did?

Will Kate be another Diana? I'm not comparing in terms of their family backgrounds, social status or personalities, but considering the crisis faced by the British monarchy, the declining reputation of the royal family, and the harsh realities of royal marriages, you get why I'm worried, right?